Election Pre-Gaming: Part I

Elections, my good Americans, are fast approaching, and as AC's resident athletic prodigy I, Atobe, have seen is meet to write a pre-game report so YOU can know what to expect on November 2.

The weather has been good--observe my seasonable and stylish denim jacket--and the forebodings for next Tuesday have been no less auspicious. While, as a fellow political animal reminded me, we cannot count our chads before they catch--that would be political pre-gaming--as a friend of the President Obama once said, "You don't need a weather man to tell which way the wind's blowing"--especially when it's filled with cherry blossom petals. As I, Atobe, see it, the question is not whether we shall celebrate, but until what hour in the morning the party shall last. The time has come, after years of losses thanks to unpopular neoconservative wars and immoral, ineffective Keynesian economics, for a resurgence by a hopefully reinvigorated Republican party. The time has come, to put it otherwise, for a Republican party!

No: I, Atobe, shall not deign to predict whether America's party of the Right can regain control of the House of Representatives or Senate. Political websites already do a fine job forecasting such generalities. While certainly important, especially given the influence of committee chairs, there are usually enough principled mavericks, pandering moderates, and plumb sell outs to make complicate important votes beyond the numerical advantage of one caucus or the other. Rather, I shall briefly note a few fave hopefuls of interest to good traditional Catholics like me and hopefully you, great candidates with a chance to win it all, a few popular, but most under-reported. For months now, Atobe has kept an eye on:

1. Paul LePage. Remember when Maine was supposed to vote for gay "marriage" in 2008? This year, it looks like Maine might also muster the gusto to defy the social liberals in the gubernatorial race. When I first read about LePage, a Catholic, I thought, "How did this guy slip under the liberal outrage radar?" A Tea Party-backed candidate, LePage won the primary as a social conservative, and hasn't backed down. When I, Atobe, read his "Traditional Values" page, which begins, "As the eldest son of eighteen children, and a parent of five children, Paul knows how important it is to protect the traditional Maine values that have created strong communities and strong families across the state," I thought, WHOA, 18 CHILDREN! As a Jap, trust me, that sounds even cooler to me. Sadly, LePage's family growing up was "dysfunctional", but unlike some he hasn't let a sour childhood turn him into a psychopath, and is rearing a brood of his own. Both pro-life and pro-marriage (if in wishy-washy terms, but give him a break--he could be the next Chris Christie), LePage would be a better executive than a New England state deserves.

By the Grace of God, LePage has a strong lead. According to a recent poll, LePage is at 40%. Doesn't sound promising, but the Left is evenly split--a clean 26% each--between Democrat Libby Mitchell and liberal Independent Eliot Cutler. Both of the prospective losers are for "marriage equality" which, according to St. Paul, is a contradiction in terms.

2. Bill Brady. Though a production of the bad guys, this one was too good to pass up. Illinois is definitely NOT one of the great states in this union. As politicos will recall from February, the horrendous liberal Mark Kirk won the Republican Senate primary with little opposition. However, Providence saw fit for them to have a gubernatorial candidate even better than Paul LePage. Yes, Chicago liberals have met their match. If you liked LePage, you'll love Brady; if you didn't, no help will be availing. See, that same February day, a slew of indistinguishable Chicago city boys appeared were vying neck-and-neck for the nomination, but out of nowhere Brady won. A backwoods boy, the severe fragmentation of the field allowed him to win with just 20% of the vote; and he beat the next contender by 155,527 to 155, 334, a difference of just 193 votes!

Brady, another Roman Catholic, is a too-good-to-be-true candidate. Not only is he against abortion without the usual exceptions, but he, a state senator, introduced a bill to prohibit gay "marriage" and civil unions after he won the primary, so you know he's for real. Besides supporting gun rights as above, he also wants to get the death penalty alive and kicking again. Though Brady usually does better in the polls that the ignominious candidate Kirk, one of the latest polls has him leading Democrat Pat Quinn by but 5%, so keep him in your prayers, and remind all the Bulls fans in your life just what's at stake here.

3.Tom Tancredo. Perhaps there will be a Constitution party also. The former-Republican congressman and presidential candidate, who needs no introduction, is within striking distance of getting elected Governor of Colorado over the Democrat and a Republican he's totally overtaken in the polls. Besides the usual pro-family goodies I, Atobe, expect of candidates, he's so strong on immigration that even I, Atobe, in these United States on a mere student visa, cower in fear at Tancredo--but of course, he is merely imitating us Japanese in all his salutary policies. If he wins, there shall be no more illegals in Colorado: a clampdown will surely round up those fool enough not to flee. On the downside, Tancredo lost the faith of his youth and is now a Protestant heretic, so pray for his conversion unto the one fold of the one true Church.

Part II coming soon! Until then

Be awed at the sight of my prowess!